Calling All Men: Fighting the Stigma Against Asking for Mental Health Help
Ron Aronofsky is a strong, handsome, funny guy. Just take a glimpse at his Tiktok feed and you will see him pumping iron, bopping along with popular songs, opining on dogs, dating, and…mental health.
This strongman from New Hampshire has taken on a formidable opponent: the stigma of asking for help with mental health -- particularly for men who, studies show, are less likely to seek treatment for mental health issues than women.
Untreated mental health problems are becoming another “silent killer,” warned psychologist Bernita Chapman, in a 2020 article in the American Journal of Men’s Health. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, suicide rates in the United States rose by 4% from 2020 to 2021. During that time for males ages 15 to 24, suicides rose by 8%.
Aronofsky says he is a perfect example of that unwillingness to acknowledge emotional struggles. He openly talks about how he used to use drugs and alcohol to numb his feelings, and admits to his descent into despair in 2019 when he was working as a State Corrections Officer.
In a recent WMUR interview, he recalls that “In a span of six hours, I went from working in a suicide watch tier to me being in a psychiatric hospital and being on suicide watch.”
Aronofsky said the stress of his job took a toll on him.
“Seeing other inmates attempt suicide and harm themselves really started to change how I saw life,” he said.
That mental health crisis led to Aronofsky asking for help with his emotional struggles, an act that was both liberating and life-saving. It was the triggering event for a new mission in his life. “Now, I don’t stop talking about mental health,” Aronofsky said in an interview with Morning Chalk Up, a website affiliated with the Crossfit fitness organization. “Whereas before, even up until September 14, 2019, those words just never came out of my mouth, and it’s so scary. But then once you actually ask for help and get it, you’re like, ‘it really wasn’t that bad’.”
A fitness coach for Rockingham Crossfit, Aronofsky also invests time in his Tiktok feed at rob_arrow48, which now boasts 130,000 followers and has amassed more than 3.1 million views. He posts short videos often on mental health topics and suicide prevention, speaking in a casual and approachable manner, emphasizing that it’s OK to ask for help.
In his Chalktalk interview, he explained: “We need to, as a community of people, be comfortable having very uncomfortable conversations. And that’s not easy, right? But for me now, if you came to me and you said, ‘Hey, Rob, I’m struggling’, one of the first questions out of my mouth would be, ‘Are you suicidal?’ For 99% of the population, it would be so taboo to have those words come out of their mouth because they’re not ready for that answer when the person says yes,” Aronofsky said. “I think the best response in that moment, and what I would want is someone to say is, ‘Okay, I hear what you’re saying. How can I best support you right now?’ Right? Because you might not know what it’s like, whatever my trauma is, whatever I’m experiencing…but if we open the door and at least say, ‘Hey, what can I do to best support you right now?’”.
The Indianapolis Colts football team has stepped up to engage in the mental health conversation, targeting males with its “Kicking the Stigma” campaign; it is an organization-wide effort to publicize the message that “It’s OK to not be OK.” The campaign has enlisted big names in sports and entertainment in the multi-year effort to raise awareness and funds for a foundation which provides grants to nonprofits working in the mental health field.
To launch the effort, the Colts produced a series of national PSAs, in collaboration with the legendary rock band R.E.M., using their chart-topping song, “Everybody Hurts”. PSAs also featured Colts Owner & CEO Jim Irsay, as well as rapper Snoop Dogg, and the Colts’ Peyton Manning, Darius Leonard, and Tony Dungy, as well as other current and former Colts players and executives. Watch one of those commercials here.
For more information about mental health resources in NH, please visit the resources section of the Zerosuicidesnh website at: Suicide Prevention Resources — NH Coalition for Suicide Prevention (zerosuicidesnh.org)